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Posts Tagged ‘wedding unity ceremony’

Congratulations Laura & Laura! What a beautiful wedding celebration today at Rancho Buena Vista Adobe in Vista.

These two amazing women were such a treat, it was an honor to officiate their wedding ceremony.

They created a very unique Unity Ceremony, inspired by their love of chocolate. And during the ceremony, shared with their guests!

A delicious ceremony treat for wedding guests

A delicious ceremony treat for wedding guests

 

There will be times that are sweet,
filled with cream and honey,
and times that are dark and bittersweet.
And probably some times that are really nutty!
But every experience will nourish your body,
heart and soul.

 

It is a great reminder to get creative with your wedding ceremony! Think about what you love (like chocolate!) and incorporate that into your ceremony.

 

PS. Wedding planner extraordinaire Julie Scrivner pulled everything together with ease!

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In addition to favorite readings and poems, what else can you include in your wedding ceremony to give it substance and personality?

Wedding ceremonies based in traditional religions have rituals that weave the ceremony together and help the couple feel anchored in the message.

For example the smashing of the glass in the Jewish faith suggests, as a modern interpretation, the fragility of the relationship and importance of tending to it daily.
The Unity Candle in the Catholic faith represents two families and two individuals uniting as one.
In the Chinese heritage the tea ceremony performed on an auspicious date is an intimate ritual to honor family.

So, if you don’t practice a religion that provides these ‘anchors’ of timeless ritual, you can create your own! During the ceremony it’s a moment to do something together, to create together as a couple.

Questions to ask yourself when deciding what to include:

~What is important about including this?
~How can we make this ritual meaningful for our unique relationship?
~Is it timeless? Ten years from now will the meaning still hold true for us?

A few ideas:

Unity Ceremonies are designed for exactly that – uniting two together. Two individuals uniting into one couple. Two families joining as one extended family. One partner with children combining with another partner, to create their new family.

Jen and Jon loved sailing, so "tying the knot" as their unity ceremony made perfect sense. Photo by Philip DeFalco

Jen and Jon loved sailing, so “tying the knot” as their unity ceremony made perfect sense. Photo by Philip DeFalco

Anything that symbolizes this experience is a great ritual to include. Think of things that are important to you and your relationship, experiences you enjoy, and find a way to incorporate that as your unity ceremony.

Start Something New. Planting a tree is an elegant and organic ritual, and supports the environment as well! The roots can grow deep, symbolizing strength and stability. The branches will grow tall and wide, symbolizing your reach and growth. The leaves bud and blossom – potential for new beginnings within your relationship.

Just enough room for a bottle of wine, opener, two letters. And I love the well-used old hammer - what a great touch! Photo by Anika London.

A wedding time capsule can include whatever you want. This one has just enough room for a bottle of wine, opener, two love letters. And seal it up with a well-used old hammer – what a great touch! Photo by Anika London.

Design a Wedding Time Capsule. This can be a promise for the future, and an opportunity, when you open it, to look back on how far you’ve come. To bring that ceremony day along with you into the future. To let the ceremony itself be your anchor in your marriage.

Just as you might create new traditions in your new marriage and family, you can start with your wedding ceremony.

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I’ve never been one for trends. But read wedding blogs, sites, and magazines and those – the leading industry trends – are the headlines on how to plan your wedding.

The message to create a wedding ceremony that is “unique” is rampant.

Following the trends is so intoxicating because they are driven by the insistence that you, the wedding couple, must be interesting, fabulous, entertaining, and surprising. That you avoid at any cost what might appear to be a cookie-cutter wedding or – God forbid – boring.

Within the world of weddings, “unique” is becoming ubiquitous.

In more than 12 years as a wedding professional and 7 years officiating wedding ceremonies, I can’t tell you how many times I’ve witnessed the Blending of the Sands unity ceremony. And guess what? I’ve never been bored by it.

Because I always see the couple – this beautiful couple in love who have created a relationship that brought them, against many odds, to this point of rare commitment. They are blending their sand in their own way, with their particular personalities and talents and intentions.

In 12 years I have never heard the same love story.

So, trust that you are inherently unique. That your story is special.

Trust that you are enough.

Give yourself a break and create the wedding ceremony that makes you happy, that tells your story. No matter how many times that unity ceremony has been performed or that poem read: for YOUR wedding, it’s happening for the very first time.

And if one of your guests – for whom you have taken such care in inviting and accommodating – is bored at your wedding: that’s their problem.

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