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Archive for August, 2014

When I tell people I perform baby blessings, often a smile appears, followed by slight confusion around the eyes.

My sister asked, “Like in the Lion King?”
Well, definitely with the enthusiasm and sense of community, but without quite so much drama, and there is no dangling of babiesThe-Lion-King-the-lion-king-13191392-800-600 over a cliff.

So, I continue describing, “it’s taking a moment to honor this new little life in your life. To focus on your intentions for parenting this child, the promises and commitments you are making to your little one. Even asking for support from your friends and family.”

But beyond promises, intentions, and support of community, it’s a moment to invite the Divine into your baby’s life and purpose while they play on Earth, whatever that means to you.

You can make the Baby Blessing ceremony a big occasion and invite all of your extended family, friends, and people in your community.

Or it can be an intimate ceremony, just the two of you and your child.

Whatever you create, it’s a time to focus on honoring the Sacred Experience of bringing this child into the world and promising to do your best to help the child be their best.

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Photo Credit: Patricia Lucia Photography

Photo Credit: Patricia Lucia Photography

Another beautiful wedding at Twin Oaks Golf Club! (and shoutout to Pamela Spence who makes everything run smoothly at TwinOaks!)

I loved creating this ceremony with Leesa and Gordy, for their June wedding.

They included so many personal touches:

~A Stone Blessing from their guests

~The Circle of Family ceremony to include the children

~Personal Vows and very personally selected readings

Photo Credit: Patricia Lucia Photography

Photo Credit: Patricia Lucia Photography

“Gayle you were exactly what we wanted for our wedding: calm, kind, sincere, helpful, authentic, spiritual! Thank you for helping us to write our vows and for helping us to stay calm and centered. . . . You are well-suited for what you do. God gave you a gift!”~ Leesa and Gordy, Twin Oaks Golf Course wedding

And thank you to Tricia Lucia for beautiful photos!

Just before their ceremony begin, two hawks flew directly over their arch. I took that as a great sign!

Hawks fly overhead at TwinOaks GolfClub

Hawks fly overhead at TwinOaks GolfClub

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Why You Want to Hold A Wedding Rehearsal

It seems like such a simple thing, the wedding ceremony.
Your wedding party lines up, you walk down the aisle, say your “I Dos” and then walk back up the aisle.

What’s to rehearse?

Amazingly – a lot. Even if your ceremony is quite simple, holding a rehearsal is actually a gift, to yourself and your wedding attendants.

It’s the gift called, “On wedding day, nobody has to think.”
All logistics and questions get sorted out, so when the big day arrives, the only order of business is to enjoy yourself.

And guess what!? It’s one more opportunity to hug your friends and family and celebrate at rehearsal dinner afterward.

Even if you have a small gathering and wedding party – for example only a Maid of Honor and Best Man – it’s a great idea to take a half-hour and walk through the order of things. Especially if your ceremony takes place at a unique setting or outdoors.

~Where will you start walking? Who stands where?
~Are the rings on a pillow? With the best man? One with Best Man and one with Maid of Honor?

It is important to practice the lineup so your attendants will feel comfortable with where and how they will stand. Photo by 8twenty8 Studios

It is important to practice the lineup so your attendants will feel comfortable with where and how they will stand. Photo by 8twenty8 Studios

~What about the timing of the music? If you can bring your ipod along or play the processional song on your phone, all the better to practice to make sure you are walking during your favorite part of the song.

~Where will you go once you walk back up the aisle?

You won’t believe how many questions start popping up once you are rehearsing.

Who Should Attend?
Anybody walking down the aisle.
~If some of your wedding party can’t attend due to travel plans, have someone else serve as their stand-in during rehearsal.

~If your grandparents will be included in the processional, it might be challenging for them to attend rehearsal, and that’s ok. It’s a simple thing to fill them in on wedding day of where to walk and sit, before the ceremony begins.

Conducting the Rehearsal
As the wedding officiant, I include conducting rehearsal in my services.
If you have hired a wedding planner (good choice!) they will conduct the rehearsal, and I still attend to review the flow of the ceremony itself.

Rehearsal is also a great time for me to reconnect with the couple in person, especially if I haven’t seen them in the many months or year since we first met.

Orchestrating the Processional
Wedding professionals like to start backward – to line the wedding party up where you will land after the processional. Then practice the recessional (after you have been pronounced married!) and then line up from the beginning to practice walking in.

There are so many fun and unique ways to craft the processional. Especially with more couples having co-ed attendants on each side, you can get really creative:
~Wedding attendants can walk down singly or in pairs or in specific groupings, and from different starting points.
~A groomsman might escort family members, then return to stand in processional line.
~You can create this any way you wish,

Reviewing the Ceremony
Again, how hard can it be? You just say “Yes” or “I Do” when asked a question, right?

Where will you stand during the Unity Ceremony? You can practice this too! Photo by Chelsea Anne Photography

Where will you stand during the Unity Ceremony? You can practice this too! Photo by Chelsea Anne Photography

 

 

If you are including a Unity Ceremony or other ritual, again, great idea to go through the motions.

~Where will the table be that holds the items?
~Will you have your backs to your guests, or facing them?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The "HandBinding" ritual includes six questions of vows and commitment. / Photo by Hung C. Tran Photography

The “HandBinding” ritual includes six questions of vows and commitment. / Photo by Hung C. Tran Photography

 

 

~If you are including a HandBinding ritual, is the ribbon you acquired long enough to wrap around your wrists 6 times without cutting off circulation?

 

 

 

 

Even practicing the simple act of the ring exchange is important. That way there is no bafflement or confusion during the actual ceremony:

With this ring . . . Photo by Katie Jackson

With this ring . . . Photo by Katie Jackson

~Which hand to I take?
~Which finger?
~Where does the engagement ring go?

Instead, you can slide that ring on their finger with grace, ease, and confidence.

 

 

 

Because, after all, this is a beautiful production. And, if on your wedding day, you can enter the sacred space of the ceremony with confidence that you and all your loved ones know their roles and tasks, you can focus all your attention and joy on that most important moment of “I DO.”

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